Joke all you want, doesn’t excuse the lack of diversity.

White Male Rage and Parasite were the big winners tonight.

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It’s gonna win a dozen Oscars, isn’t it?

Old Hollywood sure had a focus on feet, didn’t it?

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oscars 2014 selfie twitter

Turns out that celebrities like pizza and taking selfies, too.

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world-war-z

Brad Pitt fighting off zombies? Yeah, I don’t buy it.

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Dean Pelton from Community has an Oscar now. I’m happy.

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It’s a series of tubes.

And porn.

But mostly porn.

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I should summarize Fight Club one of these days

Estrogen bait who lets Angelina and Aniston catfight amongst themselves.

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What the hell is with her face in this one?!

She has the superpower to attract all genders and babies!

God it was tough to shorten this to 10 words. The full message: Babies aren't like baby alligators, you can't flush 'em down the toilet when they stop being cute!

Babies aren’t gators, you can’t flush ’em when they’re five!

Her mother's A-List and her father's B-List, so she's a B+ right at the start!

“Oh my God, it’s so cute! I want one!

DIE!!!